An occasional perspective of the movements, developments, and responses to life as a Pastor, a concerned citizen, and family man.
Monday, February 7, 2022
The Curious History of James Millikin and My Childhood Home
Wednesday, May 12, 2021
Thirty years on...
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| Richard Wayne Butterick, 1963 |
When you died, George H.W. Bush was President of the United States. We had completed Operation Desert Storm in February. The Soviet Union still existed. The Dow Jones Industrial 30 topped 3,000 for the first time. Something called the World Wide Web was launched and Microsoft.com. Many people said when gasoline prices get over $1.50 per gallon, they were going to walk!
I could not even drive. Nathan was in 7th grade. Brian was in his first apartment, I think.
I still struggle whenever Mothers' Day weekend arrives, because it is always around this date. Our family day of infamy. Followed by seasons of grief, anger, guilt, and regret.
Life moves at the same pace, yet it is hard to believe that this coming weekend one of your grandsons will graduate from high school. You did not get to meet any of your grandchildren on this side of life. You live for them whenever we recall you to life, and every once in a while, whether it is a gleam in the eye, a particular physical gesture or response, we see a little bit of you in them.
The dark clouds of your unexpected passing have faded towards the horizon as we moved through other seasons of our lives. The feeling of absence has never left us, but the reality of life pushed us forward, onward into what felt like a distant future now present today. I have lived twice as much time without you as I was able to have with you. In those first days, weeks, months, and years, I wondered if I could.
Absent from us in body, present with us in our hearts. From time to time finding ourselves wondering how you would have responded, what you would have said and whether you would be pleased with our life choices and responses. We suspect some paths we would have not followed or gone. We suspect other paths could or would have been.
We have had other joys as well as sorrows. Other worries as well as peace. A few hellos and a few goodbyes. Comedy and tragedy. Life experience in all of its sunshine and shades. We still live, laugh, and love, even with the hole in our hearts your leaving all too soon opened.
How can it be thirty years since we heard your laugh, your voice, or felt your hand or see you coming to us? The glasses off-center, as you sat napping in the recliner, still clutching the remote that Nathan and I could never retrieve from your firm hand. That annoyed look when Mom was trying to talk to you while you read the afternoon Champaign-Urbana News-Gazette. The short pants and t-shirt dripping with sweat as you have put up the weed-wacker and enjoying a cold one (Michelob, if I remember correctly...) after a few hours of yard work. You popping a tape cassette with your distinctive handwriting declaring "Who Else? Big "O" on the label. Making the greyest shredded potatoes for breakfast, along with corned beef hash in the muffin tins. That weird habit of making lime jello with shredded carrots in it. Or the kidney bean salad. Wondering why I wanted to be a lawyer instead of a musician when I got done with high school.
And yet it is true. It has been thirty years. And I can still remember you. And those thirty years now distant fall away, and I am back in the family room at 248 E Franklin, Bement, Illinois, impressed with the picture-in-picture on our new 30-inch Magnavox in the entertainment cabinet, listening to the dryer run and the patio door open to let the springtime air into the home again.
You are dozing off in the recliner again. And this time I will get that remote....
Thursday, May 16, 2019
Remembering William Stuart Hudspeth (October 19, 1921 - May 4, 2019)
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| The William & Helen Hudspeth Legacy: Daughter- Georgina Zeuner, Great-Grandson-Jonathan Clemens, Grandson-Nels Dale, Daughter-Judy Dale, Granddaughter-Laura Clemens, Son-in-Law-Larry Dale |
Tuesday, May 8, 2018
Welcome to the family, Lupus...
His passion for all things history, especially the specific knowledge of weaponry of the World War II combatants, is nearly legendary. His consideration of other's feelings and their situations reveals my limitations in compassion and generosity. There is the innate sense of seeking justice for others and coming to the side of those who are unjustly treated. Fairness is a necessity in life.
He brought new experiences to us. Some were scary, like unexpected febrile seizures around 2 years old. A little asthma, and ear infections until tubes widened his narrow infection-prone passageways. Every time he faced threats to health, he rallied (and we prayed) and came through unscathed.
And every challenge had no impact on his optimistic, cheerful embrace of life and the wonders of living and growing in this still young 21st century.
His most recent battle began with his legs.
He started to move slower, shuffling rather than striding. It seemed an effort to cross the school parking lot to our car.
Being a fourteen-year-old boy also meant the beginning of a height climb, passing his mother's height and sneaking up on his father: 5ft 6 1/2 to Dad's 5ft 8 1/2 in just six months. Then the acne appeared. No problem, just a prescribed cream will clear up the inevitable teenager scourge.
But it didn't. It became a beautifully inflamed red nose and cheeks under the eyes. A steroid began to work, but the rash still was present, though faded.
Then the long-lasting winter of 2018 brought its last hurrah; a series of nasty head colds to the Butterick homestead on Prairie. An examination revealed enlarged lymph nodes and the symptoms of pneumonia present.
So on May 1, Patrick was admitted to Decatur Memorial for treatment of pneumonia. It didn't respond to available antibiotics, and since pleurisy and fluids were still present, transfer to St. Johns Springfield was necessary for a possible chest tube and drain. At St. John's, it stopped with a different set of antibiotics. The rash was treated with some zinc cream, making it fade a little more. Two viruses and a bacterial had been identified, but it seemed the bacterial was responding well and of course, viruses just need to fade on their own.
Then blood test results revealed markers. Markers leaving no room for dispute: lupus. And the nearest pediatric rheumatologist? St. Louis Children's Hospital.
"Am I going to have to be transferred AGAIN?" said Patrick. Another ambulance ride. Another round of tests, but a proper introduction to our new live-in: lupus in our teenage son. A lifetime occupant who will challenge us and not pay any of its associated living expenses. Yes, lupus is more prevalent in women, but it can appear anywhere, anytime, and to anyone.
But you have chosen a hell of a fighter in my son, Lupus. He will not take this lying down. Patrick will study the battleground, maintain his defenses, and force a retreat no matter what the cost.
Welcome to the family, Lupus. We plan to make your stay as unpleasant and uncomfortable as possible. Prepare for battle.
Wednesday, July 26, 2017
Remembering Robert Dean Day
You were first known to me as Bobby Day. And I probably first met you in first grade. Sure, you were in Kindergarten class, but in those ancient early 1980s, there was still Morning Kindergarten and Afternoon Kindergarten at Bement School District No. 5. Morning was for "townies" and Afternoon was for "country." I was one of those "townies" and you were one of those "country."
I'm sure if I could track down all of the class group photographs through our Elementary and Middle School years I would remember when we had the same grade school or middle school teachers. I know we shared many field trips.
Even in those early years, I can recall you being between our emerging class athletes and our emerging scholars. Sure, there was a little scholarship among the athletes as there was a little athletic prowess among the scholars. You didn't shun either, and seem to move freely between both worlds, often laughing and sharing those invaluable tokens of friendship that seem to radiate from your positive, if a little shy, developing personality.
Whatever you seem to focus upon, you did well. No, some academic subjects were not your best, but no one would doubt your tenacity in trying. Some excelled while others struggled. You may have barely crossed it, but you finished all the same.
As those children of the eighties became the awkward young adults of the early nineties, you changed from Bobby to Bob. The event that I will always recall involving you and I in those early adulthood days was both of us struggling a bit in Mr. Hensley's biology class Freshman year. And so we agreed to cheat. I would allow just enough of my test answers to show and you would somehow arrive at the same answers.
But having the exact same answers gave away our cheating conspiracy. We were both summoned into Mr. Hensley's office in the Chemistry lab and were informed that the next time we planned to do that, one of us should at least change one of our answers so they would not be exactly the same.
And we never cheated in science classes again.
Our 1994 Bement High School yearbook makes a good gateway back to those memories long forgotten. Of course my high school activities centered around music; your activities were athletics. But if Bement High School had a Future Farmers of America chapter in the early 1990s, there would be no doubt in anyone's mind who would be involved. You. That calling into agriculture was present early and impossible for you to resist.
Being fellow classmates in a small town school forms unbreakable bonds of friendship. We completed our studies together, and each moved into other chapters, other places to start new life, form new relationships, find loving partners, and raise our own children. Many of those small town values of faith, community service, and helping others remain as markers of our identity. Your legacy is a rich tapestry of those values loved and lived.
In the busyness of life, we often believe that we will always have time to reconnect, to reminisce, and perhaps naively, live long into our healthy, seeming invincible lives.
But mortality has already brushed near to our 1994 class. Strokes and heart attacks have touched a few of our classmates, me included
And then came the tragic news of you passing from us. Suddenly the fragile nature of life came into our everyday, seemingly invincible middle ages.We knew someday the common fate of all living things would begin its painful harvest. We did not know that you would be the first to cross the threshold of eternity.
We were all given a special person to share our lives with in just forty-one years.
We are shocked, upset, angry, and grieving at your passing from our lives.
We will feel your absence every time we gather again as the Bement High School Class of 1994.
There will be that empty chair, that silence where there used to be the sounds of your contagious laughter and gregarious personality.
We will keep vigil and share our stories of you and our love with your grieving widow Kristina and your beloved son Lukus Dean.
Bobby, Bob, Robert Dean Day, you will be carried in our hearts, in our thoughts, until each of us cross the threshold.
And when we do, I know the first sound we will each hear.
The sound of your laugh.
Thursday, May 12, 2016
Twenty-five Years Later
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| Richard Wayne Butterick, graduation 1963 |
Sunday, May 12, 1991, my own personal day of infamy. My childhood was suddenly, and in a sense deliberately attacked, by a combination of forces and powers that have had a long history in my family tree. Your heart, from birth given a murmur, and unknown to us at the time, already suffering from previous cardiovascular "incidents," stopped its work. You apparently suffered very little in the end, but those who have survived these last twenty-five years have suffered the unreachable separation created in a moment one early Sunday morning.
You were only 46 years old.
Mom was 35.
Brian was 23.
I was 15.
Nathan was 12, turning 13 in just 3 days.
Our lives had only just begun their journey from childhood into adulthood. And now my adulthood has its own birthday: May 12, 1991.
Standing shell-shocked in the sanctuary of First Christian Church of Bement as both Nathan's and my own classmates visited. Emotionally numb sitting next to Mom at your graveside. Forever altering how I respond to the Mother's Day holiday, since it was on Sunday, May 12, 1991. Casting a long shadow on Nathan's birthday, even though Mom was careful to not have any of your funeral or graveside service on the day.
Each significant event to come into our lives had a felt absence. Learning to drive your beloved 1991 Ford Ranger truck with its stick shift. Graduating high school. You would probably be happy to see the son who wanted to be an attorney on May 11, 1991 transformed his career path towards music instead, keeping up the talent you were so proud to watch and grow. And then into ministry, which at an early age you also explored as a possible career, but hesitated when you thought about the necessity of speaking in public and at funerals.
You loved each of your sons as the individuals they were, and never had a favorite one. Each one of us were your favorite in our own way. Since your high school prophecy predicted a career in automobile repair, you would be delighted that Nathan has his own business doing something he loves; fixing automobiles. But he probably wouldn't be able to finish any jobs with you sitting or standing next to him while he worked! Brian acquired your love-hate talents in home repair and remodeling.
And you always desired a bit of the country as a place to live. Mom and Nathan live into that dream.
But these twenty five years without you have not been without unexpected blessings. Mom met a remarkable man to be another companion for her and a fatherly figure for your teenage and twenty-something sons. Norman Harpster was the best fit we could have asked for in a step father. He never put himself into your shoes, because he knew he could never fill them anyway. He believed what you believed: each of your sons were a unique bundle of talent and skills, and he encouraged us to be whatever our talents and skills took us. I hope you two have already met and traded stories.
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| Richard Wayne Butterick, around 13 years old |
Both of your grandsons carry parts of your name as part of theirs.
Our musical tastes were greatly influenced by the massive record collection you took such joy in setting upon the turntable. And yes, we all have Roy Orbison in our own collections.
The same icy finger which stilled your heart at last has touched one of your son's hearts. It now has a lifetime injury upon it, but it still beats. There are much better outcomes in cardiovascular health and treatment than in 1991. And I benefited from these improvements.
Each of us catches a glimpse of you in our bathroom mirrors every day. There are certain behaviors, both good and bad, that are clearly drawn from you as their source. Sometimes we are consciously aware of your presence, other times we subconsciously respond.
And as long as each one of your survivors live, share your stories, share our memories of you, in a sense, you never leave us. We still talk to you from time to time. There are times when I find myself repeating my first written sentence to you: IMADATYOUDAD. Our day of mortality is yet concealed from us, when we will also separate our life from living on this blessed earthly home. I only hope that my custody of your rich legacy has been adequate, and passes into the third, fourth, fifth generation of those who will forever claim you as their common ancestor.
And you are still proud of your widow and your sons.



